The further I get into the political arena, the more doubt creeps in about whether or not I am doing the right thing.

In the first place, you learn why politicians become jellyfish. What do you say to the lady who hates fireworks? Do you lie, and say, "I hate fireworks, too?." Or do you risk losing the vote of this one-issue candidate by defending fireworks, since you know there are lots of fireworks fans out there?

What about the "potential" constituent who wants the loose dogs rounded up? Do you pander to one or two irate voters, risking the loss of all the votes from folks whose dogs run loose?

Now I understand the importance of polling. Time for a "loose dog" poll before stepping out forthrightly and taking a stand. (Before this gets out of hand, let me state emphatically that I LOVE dogs. Cats, too. And I ADORE babies.)

While we're about it, include fireworks in that poll.

Another thing. Everybody is upset about natural gas prices, even before they have lit their pilot lights. Never mind that you are as worried as they are about the impending doom of a cold winter.

Their reasoning goes like this: The city provides the gas. You will be representing them if you get elected. And anything you say can, and will, be used against you.

Just fix it.

What is worse, people begin treating you differently when you run for office. Have you ever entered a crowded room, and folks start shying away and treating you like a dog with the mange?

Maybe it's my imagination; nevertheless, I am a pretty fair lip reader. (It is a curse.) The other night at the funeral home a lady way across the crowded room was looking at me with raised eyebrows and mumbling to her companion. "There's that old fart that thinks he's gonna get elected to city council."

Same to you, lady.

My wife says I'm paranoid. But she didn't want me to run anyway, and she is delighting in my misery.

The other day I came in at noon after a hard morning of knocking on doors.

"What's for lunch?" An innocent enough question.

"Fix it yourself, councilman," she answered.

The fact that the kitchen faucet had been dripping for a week probably explained part of her attitude.

I don't think the promise, "I'll fix it after the election ", is going to gain me a vote.

Or any lunch, either. So I'm ending this now and going to the drug store for a sandwich.

But all this is said just to remind you of the great sacrifice we politicians make to serve you!

(At this point, imagine a waving flag and a drumroll.)